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Same-Sex Parents and Mother’s Day

Lesbian couple celebrating mother's day with their daughter

Once a year, we all spend time being thankful for our moms and everything they have done for us. We do the same for fathers on Father’s Day. It’s a time when we may pamper mom by bringing her breakfast in bed when we’re younger, or sending her a card or giving her a call when we’re older. You’ll see Mother’s Day sales everywhere for items that mom will love. In a traditional family, it’s usually pretty easy to determine who the father is and who the mother is.

Things can get a little tricky for same-sex parents. When both of you are female or both of you are male, there may be some conflict over figuring out who should be celebrated. Sure, you can celebrate the both of you, but some feel that takes away from the specialness of the day. The good news is there are plenty of ways you can celebrate the occasions, and there are really no rules when it comes to Mother’s Day and Father’s Day. Still, here are some ways other same-sex parents handle it. Perhaps one of these solutions will work for you, or maybe you will find something completely different.

Use Traditional Roles

In a traditional family, there are traditional roles. In general, the father will work outside the home while the mother stays home and takes care of the kids. Of course, there are many different ways families function, and the older traditional roles are starting to become less and less common. For example:

  • Many families have both parents working outside the home.
  • The father can stay at home while the mother works outside the home.
  • There are many mothers (or fathers) who work from home, either through self-employment or through a company.

Either way, you can take the traditional roles when determining who should get Mother’s Day and who should have Father’s Day. If you work outside the home while your spouse stays home with the kids, maybe you should let him or her have Mother’s Day. Father’s Day can be just as special, and you don’t have to consider it as only Father’s Day. On the other hand, if you both work outside the home, consider which of you spends more time with the kids. Chances are, things are not 50/50 in your relationship. You can use this for determining how to celebrate.

Make It a Two-Day Affair

No one says that Mother’s Day has to be just one day. Mother’s Day is on a Sunday, so you can use Saturday and Sunday to celebrate. One of you gets Saturday, while the other gets Sunday. Another option would be to use two consecutive Sundays if your work schedules are busy. That way, you both get your own special day.

Share Mother’s Day

Of course, you could always share the day too. This may be more fun than you think. The two of you have an excuse to pamper yourselves as much as you want. This may mean going out for lunch, going on a shopping spree, or eating endless amounts of chocolate. Only the two of you can decide what exactly Mother’s Day means for you. As your children get older, they may take over the planning so all you both have to do is sit back and relax.

In all honesty, it really doesn’t matter how you celebrate Mother’s Day, and the same goes for Father’s Day. Of course, this doesn’t mean we shouldn’t take advantage and appreciate all parents, because parents are very important and often don’t get the recognition they deserve. Still, try not to take things too personally if you don’t get a day all to yourself like traditional parents.

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